As far as I can tell, there are four stories you can choose to live. You can choose to be a Dreamer. You can choose to be a Follower. You can choose to be an Opportunist. Or you can choose to live a Strong Story.
In my previous article, Why Strengths Are All About The Story, I gave you Donald Miller’s definition of story. Just to remind you, he says, “A story is a character who wants something and overcomes conflict to get it.”
I’d like to enlarge that definition here.
Here’s my definition…
Strong Story = Strong Character + Clear & Compelling Vision + Embraces Challenges
I’ll expand on each element of this equation in future articles. For now, I’ll let you define these for yourself. Instead, let’s look at how each element, when combined with another, creates the four stories of our lives.
The Dreamer
The Dreamers are Strong Characters who have a Clear and Compelling Vision for what they want, BUT they don’t Embrace the Challenges it takes to get there. Without the tenacity to welcome the day-to-day trials, a dreamer can only ever hope to spin tales of adventure and victory and grandeur inside the confines of their minds.
These are the people whom Theodore Roosevelt would leave outside the arena because they lack the fortitude to have their faces “marred by dust and sweat and blood.” They refrain from trying because they fear “error and shortcoming.” They recoil from valiant striving. They tremble at spending themselves “in a worth cause.” In the end, they are “those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat.”
The Follower
The Follower has a Strong Character and Embraces Challenge, BUT lacks a Clear & Compelling Vision. Followers are sentenced to a life of doing without really ever getting anywhere. Or at least anywhere that matters to them or to those closest to them.
I’m reminded of Lewis Carroll’s exchange between Alice and the Cheshire Cat:
Alice: Would you tell me, please, which way I ought to go from here?
The Cheshire Cat: That depends a good deal on where you want to get to.
Alice: I don’t much care where.
The Cheshire Cat: Then it doesn’t much matter which way you go.
Alice: …So long as I get somewhere.
The Cheshire Cat: Oh, you’re sure to do that, if only you walk long enough.
If you don’t care where you’re headed, then the Follower’s story is right for you. You’ll eventually get somewhere.
The Opportunist
The Opportunists have a Clear & Compelling Vision and Embrace Challenges, BUT are devoid of Strong Character. They are unwilling or unable to know themselves. They refrain from self-improvement. They leap at opportunities without considering their morality or whether they are a good fit. They burn bridges, companies, and people. They’re fake. They may accomplish things, but they accomplish despite their lack of character.
These people might be described by this unattributed quote: “Some people just act like they are trying to help you.” They help only when it is convenient.
The Strong Story
People who live Strong Stories combine all three elements: Strong Character, Clear & Compelling Vision, and Embrace Challenges. These people are heroes and leaders and worthy of our respect. Their contributions happen outside of the realm of labels and titles. They know who they are, where they’re headed, and they do the work to get there.
To tell a Strong Story you must have courage. You must be willing to forego mediocrity. You must be brave to craft a vision that others do not understand. You must be humble in the face of obstacles and ridicule.
Finally, you must be willing to be vulnerable as you invite others to align their visions with yours.
Make no mistake about it, if you’re not intentional about your story, you WILL default to the story of the Dreamer, the Follower, or the Opportunist. Be intentional and choose the Strong Story.
Live a Strong Story. The world needs it.